


take care of me

by orphan_account



Category: The Boyz (Korea Band)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anxiety, Blowjobs, Depression, Dirty Talk, Fluff, Kinda, M/M, Pet Names, Porn with Feelings, Smut, bottom Jacob, jacob cries a couple times, kevin is disgusting, maybe a little angsty at the beginning but jacob is just depressed, sangyeon is briefly mentioned, top kevin, ummm what else
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-19
Updated: 2020-08-19
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:15:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25988812
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: jacob has been stressing way too much recently. kevin is there to put him at ease.
Relationships: Bae Joonyoung | Jacob/Moon Hyungseo | Kevin
Comments: 1
Kudos: 98





	take care of me

jacob loathed feeling like this.

empty, debilitated, anxious.

but worst of all he loathed feeling angry.

especially at his members. jacob wasnt the type to get irrationally mad. it's happened a handful of times—it really takes a lot to get jacob to that point in the first place. they didn't like pushing jacob's buttons too much because they knew that behind his angelic demeanor and face, he actually got irritated easily. and he had extremely low tolerance.

don’t get the wrong idea, he was a genuine, loving person. just not recently. they never intentionally made him mad, jacob just thought he was being a nitpicky bitch about everything lately. he started having more and more restless nights, especially as the comeback was nearing. he shared a room with sangyeon, so he virtually had no privacy to himself except when he showered, which definitely wasn't enough to please himself, besides the little escapades he had with kevin every so often. and overall he just felt...depressed. sullen.

being someone who struggles with severe depression and anxiety while you're in a kpop group thats slowly rising in popularity wasn't the best case scenario. for everyone else, maybe. but for jacob? it meant more schedules, more 4 am meltdowns, more cameras, more spacing out, more people looking at him... or were they analyzing him? staring? judging instead of admiring? ridiculing instead of praising? it was exhausting and toxic for him to think about.

and those were his reoccurring thoughts, nearly on a day to day basis. jacob had good days, obviously. but recently there seemed to be no room for good days. just a constant mix of days where he's disgusted with himself, angered, or upset.

jacob was fed up with a lot of things. so when he snapped at eric during practice he didn't even realize it. jacob looked pissed, his voice nearing the tone he almost never used around the others. eric was taken aback for a moment, all too familiar with this side of jacob from past incidents. he promptly apologized for screwing up, changmin was the one to break the silence in the room and have everyone start from the top again.

when practice ended, jacob considered going to apologize to eric, but felt it was better if he just left the entire situation alone. he had been isolating hinself from everyone, anyway. unintentionally isolating, but he still did nontheless. kevin, being the only person who knew of jacob's secrets and unhealthy habits, searched for him long after everyone was asleep.

he knew he'd be awake, anyway.

sangyeon had business to attend to that night, so he wasn't in the dorms. kevin opened the door and slid into the room quietly, not wanting to spook jacob who was sitting on his chair, leaning against the windowsill.

“cobie?" kevin called out quietly.

jacob hummed. that little nickname. hearing that come out of kevin's mouth was the only thing that made him crack a smile these days. kevin knew he loved and appreciated it.

jacob sighed, sitting up from his position on the windowsill but slouching back into his chair. "hey, kev".

jacob didn't want to face kevin at the moment. not while he looked like this. kevin knew he had been crying regardless, though.

kevin made his way over to where jacob was by his window, the breeze coming from it making this particularly humid night more bearable. he grabbed the free seat and turned it to face jacob's and sat down.

neither one of them said anything for awhile, and kevin knew that's just how jacob probably wanted it. he didn't like talking about himself, or his problems. everyone came to him to fix something, or for advice—which he was happy to give, he always was. but he never gave himself the same luxury. very rarely did that happen. and when it did, kevin was the only one hearing him.

jacob was thinking way too much. his mind had become this bottomless pit echoing with constant intrusive and scary thoughts.

_is it worth it? is this worth it? eyes constantly analyzing and ridiculing him, what did they truly think of him?_

_is the praise from fans and others genuine? is he an angel? is he? is he really? is this all some sick joke? is this real? is he real?_

his head was spinning. his eyes were shaking, tears starting to well in them as he did everything in his power to not start crying again. he started poking his tongue against his cheek, a nervous habit he's picked up lately. kevin noticed he only does it when he's upset. one of the numerous things he's noticed about jacob.

to say the least, kevin was infatuated with jacob. even the mere concept of this man was beautiful to him. he loved his face, how pretty he looked when he focused. the moles on his neck. the way his eyes crinkled when he smiled really hard. his pink lips. his calloused fingers. his hands in general, how he loved holding them. how his voice would go down an octave or two when he was tired. how that voice was reserved for kevin’s ears only. how sweet his kisses were. numerous things. jacob was the only thing that would be on kevin's mind some days. he was both in love with him and distracted by him.

kevin looked at him softly, his eyes filled with a mix of worry and fondness. "jacob, look at me."

at first, jacob didn't respond to his request. he really didn't want to be even more vulnerable than he already was tonight.

kevin placed his hand on jacob's thigh, rubbing it softly, to which jacob glanced down at the newfound warmth on his body.

" _please_. look at me."

he took a deep breath, turning his head to him.

kevin smiled softly. a warm, genuine and inviting smile. jacob felt safe.

"angel, you know it's okay right? you can cry. i won't judge you for it. you know i won't."

jacob sucked in his bottom lip and shut his eyes before everything he had been keeping pent up just erupted from him. he put his head to his hands and started sobbing. kevin was beyond concerned, but did his best to stay composed. he had seen jacob cry more than once, but this wasn't like the other times. kevin placed his hand on jacob's head, gently stroking his hair while whispering 'it's okay' and 'i'm here,' into his ear.

jacob spoke betweens sobs. "i’m just. stressed. tremendously. everything is making me anxious and angry and i feel like im going insane from keeping everything in, you know?” jacob breathed in shakily, wiping his face of the tears that kept falling. “i feel so scrutinized by everyone and constantly being watched and judged by others that have expectations of me isn’t putting my mind at ease and i don’t feel like i’ll ever live up to those expectations like— i-i just i can’t-“

“hey, _breathe_.”

jacob was shaking, he hadn’t even noticed.

“I understand,” kevin spoke. “being an idol is.. hard. and i know you have other shit on top of it just.. trust me, i get it. i know everyone deals with it differently but just—please don’t stress yourself out. you can talk to me more about it, yeah? you mean the world to me and i love you too much to see you like this.”

jacob stared at him, taking his words in.

kevin got up, and jacob looked at him, worried. he tugged on his sleeve. kevin glanced back at him and faintly smiled. "i'm not going anywhere, angel. give me a minute." jacob stared for a bit, but he reluctantly let go.

when he came back, he had face wipes in hand. kevin sat down on his chair, and patted his thigh. "come here, baby."

jacob obediently listened, going to sit on kevin's lap.

kevin started cleaning jacob's face with the wipes, admiring his face. he took everything about the sight in. jacob was so beautiful to him. jacob choked up and nearly started crying again. "i love you so much," he said, barely above a whisper. "so fucking much, kevin."

kevin gently held jacob's head in his hands, pulling him in for a kiss. it was passionate, full of adoration for one another.

"i love you. so much, more than you can imagine. let me take care of you, yeah?" jacob nodded eagerly, and to kevin’s suprise he grinded down into his lap, making him groan from the unexpected motion. the kiss did more to him than kevin initially thought.

jacob made him feel crazy. he smiled at him, but he needed to make sure. "i love you, but i need you to use your words angel. do you want me to touch you tonight? or no?" he asked fondly, holding the older by the waist.

jacob was... shy sometimes. only with kevin did he have a hard time spitting out what he wanted to say. he didn't really know the reason why—kevin just had that effect on him. even though jacob was the older one of the two, he wasn't necessarily assertive when they were intimate, only when kevin was in that sort of headspace or jacob truly felt like topping.. which never really happened. regardless, kevin wasn’t very fond of bottoming.

kevin had to be careful with jacob tonight though. he didn't plan for his little visit to his room to end up like this. it's what jacob wanted, so he would get it. kevin stared at him, not meant to intimidate him but it was the only way to get jacob to say what he wanted.

"i... want you to overstimulate me," jacob started. kevin smirked at him faintly, moving his hand to move strands from his face. "keep going, baby boy." kevin egged him on softly, and jacob mewled at the petname.

"..suck me off. fuck me." jacob kept grinding down on kevin's dick, his hips serving him well. "i need this, to take my mind off things. please, kev." kevin threw his head back from the motion of jacob's hips at work, at this rate he was gonna cum in his sweatpants. a quiet ‘fuck’ escaped kevin's lips before he lifted jacob up and put him on the bed. he stood in front of him and undressed himself except his boxers, jacob following suit. kevin pushed his legs open, positioning himself between him and kissing him.

kevin moved from his mouth to his neck (careful enough not to leave marks, but by god did he want to), down to his chest. he sucked on one of jacob's nipples and his breath hitched while his body jumped a little.

"you like that?"  
"y-yes, keep going. please."  
"mmm."

kevin continued, doing the same to his other nipple. he worked with languid movements. there was no rush, nobody around, just them. and plus, he loved to see jacob squirming from the most minute touches. kevin had finally made it to his crotch, which took fucking forever from jacob's perspective—he gave faint and small kisses to the head of his dick, giving it kitten licks that made jacob heat up.

kevin was a cockslut. he loved giving blowjobs, and he loved jacob's dick. it was on the smaller side but it was perfect, just enough to fit in his mouth. he had a non-existent gag reflex so he _loved_ filling his mouth with jacob until he was sobbing. kevin blew on it, primarily to get a reaction out of jacob. jacob’s cock twitched and he grabbed fistful of kevin’s hair and yanking it back, making kevin moan in pleasure.

"k-kevin."  
kevin looked up at him playfully. “yes baby?” he cooed at him. “if that was supposed to discourage me, it did the opposite, love."

kevin smiled devilishly at jacob, to which jacob sighed, but he let go of his hair. kevin unexpectedly took him whole, letting jacob's cock stretch out his mouth until he was at the base, moving his tounge on the underside making jacob’s jaw hang open and his eyes close shut.

he continued at it, bobbing his head and sometimes letting it hit the back of his throat, making jacob moan loudly. kevin took his cock out of his mouth with a pop, and started stroking it while licking at the head.

"i need you to be quiet my love, can you do that for me?" kevin asked. jacob nodded, his face flushed with the prettiest shade of pink.

kevin slowly stroked him and smiled. “mm, you’re so obidient, good boy.” jacob could cum from hearing kevin call him that. kevin felt beyond cocky knowing what the petnames did to him.

“or you know, you could be loud. loud enough to wake the others..i don’t recommend it, they'll find you sprawled out on the mattress while i fuck you into tomorrow.” kevin continued. jacob groaned from the imagery forming in his head. "unless you want that. i think you'd enjoy it, and i wouldn’t mind having the other members watching your ass turn every shade of red from how hard i'll be pounding into you.” kevin laughed at the thought. “i know you’d love the attention. and i’d love to claim your tight ass right in front of them."

“god, please be quiet.” jacob pleaded. he felt dizzy, the thought of any one of the members walking in on them right now made his heartbeat quicken and his cock twitch. he’d have to talk to kevin later, however he wouldn’t mind getting thrown around a bit by sangyeon... but he put it to the back of his mind for now. kevin felt his dick twitch in his hands and snorted. “whatever you want, love.” jacob’s high was quickly approaching and kevin knew so because he started to get finicky. "k-kevin, i'm _so_ close, i'm so— _fuck_ ,"

kevin put his cock back into his mouth and stroked him rapidly, jacob came in his mouth and kevin swallowed every single bit of it, but he didn't stop, he wanted to push jacob to his limit by overstimulating him.  
jacob's arms felt like they were gonna give out but he didn’t let them, wanting to enjoy the scene of kevin sucking him off. kevin looked so gorgeous like this, cheeks hollowed and hair sticking to his forehead.

kevin was sloppy, letting the saliva build up in his mouth drip out from the sides of his mouth all over jacob's inner thighs. he absolutely fucking loved how messy sex was for them, it wasn't necessarily a kink...but he enjoyed it more than he should've, probably.

jacob had tears staining his cheeks and his knuckles were white from fisting the sheets.

“god, kevin—you’re so good, you’re so good to me.” jacob kept saying praises like a mantra until they were barely comprehensible. kevin loved the praise from jacob, knowing he made him feel this good. that he was the only one making him feel this good. kevin’s mouth was stretched all around jacob’s cock, his skilled mouth pushing jacob dangerously close to the edge.

jacob came again, without warning, but kevin was only suprised momentarily, catching it all in his mouth. kevin got up and straddled jacob, pushing him down on the mattress and leaning down to kiss him with his cum still in his mouth. kevin did this sometimes, and jacob didn't really mind—he was relatively healthy (considering everything), so he didn't taste terrible. just a little bitter.

jacob broke away from the kiss. “you’re disgusting.” he joked, eyeing him fondly.  
kevin stuck his tongue out and let the mixture of substances drip from his tongue onto them. “you enjoy it.” he responded, and he wasn’t wrong.

kevin kissed him again and jacob smiled into it, exploring kevin’s mouth with his tounge, and he tasted so fucking addicting. jacob felt kevin's boner on top of him, snaking his hand down to grab and tug on it, making kevin moan into the older's mouth.

"take these off," jacob prodded, tugging at kevin's boxers.  
"yeah, get on your back first."  
"well get _off_ of me first, idiot."

kevin rolled his eyes but did what he was told, he watched jacob crawl up the bed and rest his head comfortably on the pillow, waiting for him. kevin got out of his boxers and the tip of his cock was an angry red.

kevin grabbed the lube from the drawer before he positioned himself between jacob's legs, pouring it into his hands. he spread jacobs legs some more and looked at him for approval before doing anything else. jacob smiled at him, giving kevin the go ahead.

kevin pressed a finger at jacob’s hole, making jacob’s body jolt and moan immediately from the pleasure.

kevin’s ego was fucking gigantic. “you’re so sensitive, baby. that’s all it takes for you to start whining?” kevin gripped jacob’s cock and stroked him while pushing his finger further into jacob.

jacob was tearing up again but from bliss and euphoria. kevin’s fingers felt so fucking good inside of him. it wasn’t long before kevin added another finger, and another, and jacob found himself filled with three of kevin’s fingers and his cock still being played with by kevin’s skilled hand. he felt used in such a good way and completely breathless.

“mm, are you close?” kevin asked, his fingers still fucking into jacob at an obscene rate. the word ‘yes’ spilled out of jacob’s mouth more times than kevin could count, and all he could do was smile at him.

“good. you can cum. go ahead angel.”

jacob arched his back off of the bed and moaned, his body twitching as spurts of his cum landed on his chest. it startled kevin from how loud he was but he chose to ignore it cause he sounded fucking heavenly, and he looked equally delicious too.

“you’re so perfect,” kevin praised him, slowly sliding his fingers out of jacob making him wince from the emptiness. “i’m proud of you, doing so good for me.” jacob didn’t know if it was possible to blush more than he already was, but somehow kevin made him blush more anyway. magical kevin.

“you still haven’t gotten off..” jacob spoke while coming down from his high, reminding kevin about himself with his aching cock leaking of precum. kevin sat on the bed and sighed, “i’ll be fine. tonight wasn’t about me. you still want me to fuck you?” kevin asked, and jacob winced at the thought.

“no.. not tonight. i’m spent. can i blow you though?”

kevin was appalled by the way jacob so innocently asked him that vulgar question while looking so pretty and fucked out. it did things to him. “fuck, how am i supposed to deny you asking me so nicely? come here.”

jacob pushed himself up and gave kevin a quick kiss on the lips before getting on the ground and moving between kevin’s legs.

he wasted no time and took him whole in his mouth. jacob felt sweaty, used and gross from feeling his cum sliding down his body and he wanted nothing more than to get cleaned up and sleep next to kevin, but he also wanted to reward kevin appropriately for taking care of him.

“fuuuuck.” kevin had his head thrown back, his hand grabbing jacob’s hair and practically forcing his cock further down jacob’s throat making him gag. “just like that, angel. fuck,” jacob fucking loved how harsh kevin got whenever he sucked him off. drove him absolutely fucking crazy.

and jacob looked so pretty too. tears dripping down his face and lips wrapped perfectly around kevin’s thick cock, his chin covered with spit as he kept bobbing his head up and down while humming around him. breathtaking.

the sensation was killing kevin. “ah, fuck you’re so perfect. you’re so perfect-“ kevin came quickly, which wasn’t surprising considering how sensitive and hard he was. jacob swallowed it all contently, removing his cock from his mouth and looking up at kevin like the perfect little slut he was. ‘so pretty,’ kevin thought to himself. he pushed hair off of his face and pulled jacob up to kiss him again before going to get towels and more wipes.

20 minutes later they were both in bed, clean, tired and content, holding each other close.

kevin played with jacob’s hair fondly, listening to his calm breathing while fighting with himself interally if he should bring up the situation from earlier.

“...jacob?” kevin asked quietly.

“mm?” he responded, not making more of an effort out of pure exhaustion.

“you know i.. really do love you, right? like.. i’m not just saying it. i truly do mean it. you can talk to me about anything.” kevin’s was gentle with his words, not wanting to make jacob talk about anything he didn’t want to.

jacob blinked, kevin feeling his eyelashes flutter against his chest. “yes. i know. i know you do. and i love you too. i’m sorry i didn’t tell you about this.. i normally do but i didn’t.... i didn’t want to be a bother about it.”  
kevin sighed. “listen, you’re never a bother to me, alright? i’d drop anything to listen to you talk about anything. even the hard things.”  
jacob smiled. “alright.”

jacob nuzzled his head into kevin’s chest and drifted off to sleep. for the first time in a long time, he genuinely felt at ease.


End file.
